Only the Wind
by Angel no Yami
Summary: Gohan muses over the one he loves. Yaoi warning. VegetaxGohan, the story popped into my head. gotta love muses.


This is just a one shot that I am writing because I am bored and my muses have put the idea into my head. This is just a one shot. It is shonen ai/ yaoi, if you don't like it don't read it. Flames are not tolerated on basis of the pairing of yaoi in general. However if you really feel the fic sucks that bad then you may say so, but I want a well thoughtout, logical reason behind your feelings. This is a Vegeta/Gohan fic.

I don't own Dragon Ball Z…sadly, I wish I did, I would be rich.

Now enjoy.

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Only the Wind

I love him. I know that sounds strange but I do. I didn't think about it until recently, but my feelings for the man have by all means turned into love. I used to think that he was so amazing. He was powerful, beautiful, and so interesting. I idolized him. Somewhere in time my idol became my first and only love. I can't explain it. I just know that the thought of him rejecting me made my insides churn, my heart feel like it had been ripped out of its place in my chest.

Not that I have told this to my mother. She would throw a fit. "My Gohan cannot love a man, especially not that monster!" I would be disowned. She would fight to never let me see my beautiful Vegeta again. Well he isn't mine, but I like to fantasize.

And oh the things I have fantasized. Sometimes, I want him so bad I hurt. But he doesn't know. I have never bothered to tell him. I don't think he swings that way. Him and Bulma have been together for years now, why would he want me? Not that I have seen any proof of any relationship between them, other than Trunks, who will probably be just as beautiful as his father. Ha, Vegeta would laugh if he heard anyone call him beautiful. He is though. So amazingly beautiful.

Vegeta never really leaves my thoughts. After defeating Cell I wasn't sure if my reasons for being around him were what I thought they were. When I turned fifteen last year, I finally put my feelings for him in the category of love. I was thinking about how it would have felt to be without him. I cried that night. I love him so much and knowing this scared me. My entire world was thrown upside down that night.

Ever since then my time around him has been strenuous. I have to fight to not jump him then and there. I fight to not confess my feelings and throw my heart at him. I wish my life wasn't so complicated. I love him. And I cannot tell anyone what I feel.

I asked Krillin once what sex was like. I figured the he would know, considering his relationship with Android 18. He said that it is a wonderful mind blowing experience, but only if you are with someone you love. He said that even the worst of kissers could be wonderful if you love them. The one thing he said that really stuck in my mind is that you end up really close to the person. It cannot work if you are shy or don't like to be touched. This made me laugh. (Not that I told Krillin why though. He looked at me funny when I started laughing.) Vegeta doesn't seem like the type to be touched, or be really close to someone. But then he and Bulma had to do something for Trunks to exist, right?

I move to look out my window. It is late and I am supposed to be asleep. My pajama pants (I didn't feel like wearing the shirt) were a little lower than my mom would like to see me wear them. Not that I care though. The night air is cool, and I enjoy the feel of it on my skin. I wish that the wind were his hands. I bet he is even more interesting without the clothes… I shouldn't think like that. It leads to…oh crap, too late. Now my pants are really uncomfortable. Damn it.

Oops, I guess I spend more time sparring with him than I thought. I wonder if he has ever smelled my interest. I think he mentioned something about it when he was explaining the saiyan mating cycle to me. I had to ask him. He wouldn't have told me that without my asking him to. I have asked a lot about the saiyans. He likes to explain anything involving his heritage. I get to spend hours with him just talking. He has even taught me some of the saiyan language. I see his obsession with our race as cute, and useful. I spend hours with him, learn about his past. I gain an understanding of him in a way no one else has. Have I mentioned that I get to spend hours with him, alone?

I think I did. Oh well.

I look up at the moon. We had used the Dragon Balls to bring it back a few years ago. The world functioned funny without it. We had no tides. Women like mom were having certain cycles every other week…

So we brought it back. I wish I could make a wish on the Dragon Balls. I would wish that Vegeta would love me…no, that would not be right. I want him and I love him, but I could never force him. Besides I am only sixteen, it would be weird for a sixteen year old to fight for a man older than my father, by several years according to Vegeta. He likes to talk about anything that could possibly make him superior to my father. I think it is one of his many cute quirks.

Bulma said once that love is really only love when two people feel a strong attraction to each other that it has to go both ways. A person has to love someone and they have to love them back, other wise it is just lust or just a crush. I don't know. I feel like I love Vegeta, but I know he can't feel the same. He doesn't even know how I feel.

"I want you, Vegeta." I call out into the night for no reason. Only the wind knows how I feel. It is the only entity I have ever told.

I turn around determined to go to bed now. I am tired. I sparred with him earlier today and that always causes exhaustion. After turning off the light and getting curled up comfortably in my bed, I relaxed, hoping for a good nights sleep with very scandalous dreams of Vegeta to comfort me.

And then I smell him. The scent of musk fills my nostrils as I realize that he has entered my room through my open window. As I try to sit up, he grabs my shoulders and shoves me back to the bed.

As he rips off my blanket, he says, "I thought so, boy."

I gasp, he must have been right outside my window to hear that. He catches my mouth with his. I push up into it and he backs up so that I can sit. We begin a battle for dominance. I tried to get him under me, but he began to sneak his hands into places that made me moan. He won the battle. I didn't care. He seemed to know what to do better anyway.

I woke up the next morning to see his face asleep next to me. His face is so calm. I bet he wanted to do more last night, but I don't think that my mom and Goten could have slept through us finishing what we had started last night. I made him wait for the very last step, I didn't want to wake up my family. Vegeta even admitted that I am very loud in bed. It is a very good thing that Goten got his own room a few weeks ago.

Kami. Thank you.

I love him.

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So what do you think? Tell me please, I like reviews.

Angel no Yami


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